Arousal doesn’t start the moment your clothes come off; the build up begins way before you get to the bedroom. Build up the suspense and excitement by sending each other saucy texts throughout the day, talk about the times you’ve had great sex together and what you want to do when you get your hands on each other. Love and sex coach Cate Mackenzie (www.catemackenzie.com) says: “Female sexuality can have a slow build. If you think of a kettle that takes all day to boil then you may have a good sense of how to woo your lady through regular sexy text messages, and when you are with her touch and teasing. This slow arousal can build her to a great heat and make her ravenous for you when you meet her later.”
There are very few techniques as successful at improving your orgasm than building up your longevity in the sack. Practice by masturbating right up until the point of ejaculation, stopping and waiting 30 seconds before carrying on. This technique is known as ‘edging’ to the experts and it will help you achieve ‘dry’ orgasms, aka all the fun of having one minus actually coming. With enough practice you could even find yourself having multiple orgasms. Sex expert Dr Pam Spurr (@Drpamspurr) says: “Not only is this technique excellent for enjoying better and more orgasms but it significantly helps staying power – a worry for far too many men.”
Most men go straight for the obvious erogenous zones, so do something out of the ordinary to really spice things up. “Kiss and lick her neck, eyelids and her entire face paying attention to her arms and her feet,” says Cate. “Take in her whole body, warming and stroking as many areas as you can and pay particular attention to her lower back and bottom. It’ll drive her wild.”
Research shows that the amino acid found in meats such as beef, chicken and pork improves blood flow to your penis, doing wonders for your sex life. Similarly a glass of red wine will also help to give your bedroom antics a boost, according to research by The Journal of Sexual Medicine just one glass increases sexual desire and lubrication in women which can only be a good thing for you.
Sudden changes in temperature can be extremely arousing for both of you when applied to the skin, especially during oral. Try teasing her with an ice lolly, or get her to put an ice cube in her mouth while she goes down on you. The contrast with your warm tongues will drive you both wild. “Surprise and mystery can drive you wild, so changing the temperature immediately adds an element of surprise which is a real turn on,” says Cate. “You wont regret it!”
According to research by the University of Indiana couples who performed four different sex acts during one session found that the woman reached orgasm 76% of the time and as you should know, if she’s having a good time, so will you. Sex and relationship psychologist Donna Dawson says: “Variety is great for improving your sex life, especially if you’re in a relationship as it stops you falling into a rut. It can be very hard for a woman to climax in the missionary position, so try experimenting with different techniques.”
By far the most important sexual organ we have is the brain, stimulate that and you’re on to a winner. Donna says: “There are many ways to do this but I strongly recommend blindfolding each other – not being able to see what’s happening next will be an instant turn on for you both. A lot of women don’t enjoy sex unless they are physically relaxed, so you could also try lighting candles or evening introducing massage oil to the mix – it’ll guarantee results.”
Spontaneity is key to improving your sex life. So, if you’re the kind of couple who always has sex before falling asleep at night try setting the morning alarm a little earlier and fitting in a quick session before work. “Take the yawn-factor out of your sex life with this type of spontaneity,” explains Pam. “And it doesn’t always have to be about having spontaneous, full sex. Add in a bit of a tease – wake up a few minutes early, start stroking her sensually and then whisper sweet nothings.”
Ladies and gents, we’ve got 14 tips to get you to the top of your game between the sheets, writes BESTFIT’s Leara Gabay. Eyes down…
The Sex Bomb Bath Bomb from Lush will help to get you in the mood. It contains the ancient aphrodisiac Jasmine, used as a sensual perfume for centuries in India.
Lingerie experts Ann Summers have something to suit every type of woman. Enter the bedroom in the Sky Slip dress before unveiling the Zaffre bra and brief. You will exude femininity and confidence.
A smoky eye is the sexiest of all make-up looks. Urban Decay’s Naked Eyeshadow Palette’s are amazing for creating alluring eyes. The Naked Smoky is full of sultry shades to perfect that smouldering look.
Ghost encourage you to embrace the darkness with their seductive perfume Deep Night.
For ultra smooth, irresistibly soft skin, we recommend the new Venus Swirl. The Flexiball glides over your body’s curves to leave your skin feeling flawless.
Zeos QU3 Face and Body contains Shea butter and an uplifting masculine aroma to leave your skin feeling energised and hydrated. It’s the best smelling moisturiser in the UK.
WhiteWash Laboratories Nano product range helps to repair teeth and create a radiant sheen.
A clean shave can work wonders. It will leave you feeling fresh, smooth and perhaps even
younger and healthier. The Gillette Fusion ProShield Chill is designed with cooling technology to
provide a refreshing feeling while shaving.
Armani Code Profumo is alluring, powerful and fiery. All the attributes you want to convey in the bedroom.
A recent poll by Durex showed that 74% of men worry that condoms make sex less pleasurable. That’s why they’ve released their thinnest ever condom; Invisible is designed to make sure you don’t lose sensitivity.